The Secret to Remodeling Your Brain
I'm not going to keep you in suspense any longer. So here goes.. the secret to remodeling your brain is... positive self-talk. Yep, that's it. That's the big secret. No doubt you've heard it before. But, have you really understood what it means and how truly powerful it is when it comes to your health?
So what is self-talk? The simple answer is that it's the endless stream of unspoken thoughts running through your head. Anyone who has meditated (or has tried to meditate - we all have to start somewhere) probably has a good understanding of self-talk, aka the "monkey mind". As hard as you may try to focus on the breath or a mantra, the thoughts just continue to pop up, like little bubbles constantly floating around you. Much of the time these thoughts aren't serving us.
Our minds are pretty much wired to default to negative thoughts. It's that primitive limbic brain, our internal watchdog, that means well and wants to protect us. Unfortunately, the well-meaning watchdog has gone a bit rogue in his efforts to shield us from danger (physical and emotional). For those who have been living with mystery illness for years or even decades, this negative self-talk has likely gotten increasingly strong. Not only do the thoughts attempt to keep us out of danger, but we've begun to identify so strongly with our illnesses that our thoughts revolve around the diagnoses and symptoms as well. We tell ourselves "I'm too sick" and "I don't have the energy for that" and "that would be too painful for me" and "I'm too sensitive (to smells/noise/toxins) to go out into the world."
We can actually begin to remodel our brains, use the science of neuroplasticity to our advantage, by incorporating positive self-talk as much as possible. In order to reverse this well-established trend we need to aim for 3 positive thoughts for every 1 negative one! This is no easy task, but the first step is to simply begin to notice these pessimistic thought patterns. Just be willing to catch those bubbles as they float through your mind.
The second step is become your friend. And, an easy way to do this is to replace the word "I" with "you" or [your name]. Approaching "danger" from the perspective of a friend naturally changes the dynamic. Here's an example:
It wasn't too long ago that the same old story played out in my life over and over again. Friends and family would ask me to join them for dinner at a restaurant. Those habitual thought bubbles would quickly arise -
"I'm too tired. I won't be able to eat anything there. I'm no fun to be around."
When I began to catch those bubbles and take on the role of my friend, I created distance between me and those thoughts that opened up possibilities for a different internal dialogue that didn't exist before. A loving friend wouldn't say,
"Carrie, you're too tired to have a fun night out. Carrie, don't go because you won't be able to eat the food there anyway. Carrie, you're no fun!"
No, instead my "friend" would say things like,
"Carrie, the change of scenery will be good for you! Being with friends will lift you up. Carrie, I'm sure the kitchen can make you something delicious that you can eat. Carrie, they want you to join them because they love you and you ARE fun."
As you change your thoughts, you remodel your brain. As you change your thoughts, you change your reality. As you change your thoughts, your body will follow. This ability to rewire our brains is backed by science and it's why I believe so strongly in the power of neuroplasticity - that and my own personal experience.
THIS WEEK: Investigate your self-talk. Can you begin to catch those habitual thought bubbles as they arise? As you catch them, can you begin to swap the word "I" for "you" or [your name] in an effort to speak to yourself as if you were a loving friend? Can you begin to remodel your brain?
Would you like to receive these types of posts in your inbox? Never miss one of my thought-provoking posts by signing up for my newsletter. You'll receive my Wellness Toolkit for FREE just for signing up. Win-Win!